Would you like your life to be better this time next year than it is right now? Then it means you need to make plans for that to happen. Here are three question prompts to get you started:

1. Take a sheet of paper and write (and then respond) to the question, “What isn’t working too great in your life?” My belief about staying positive is that it’s not some narrow, disconnected part of our life. Plus, it is a recursive and transactional state. When you are positive, then your relationships are better, your health is better, your job is better, your perception on how the world is going is better.

AND, when your job is going well, your relationships are in good order, your health is dandy, etc….then it’s more likely that you feel positive. There’s not a 1:1 correlation, but there is some back and forth connection. It is a transactional situation.

Be completely honest about what you write down. This won’t be of any value if you aren’t. And, if by some chance, you really don’t have anything that isn’t going great, then YAY for that!!

2. On a second page, write this question prompt: “What are you currently allowing ‘in’ through a door - that isn’t helping you - or may in fact be hurting you in your quest to be maintaining a positive frame of mind?”

  1. Are you allowing in particular people whose attitudes and words and behaviors bring you down?
  2. Have you left the door open to certain behaviors that are not helping you, but in fact, are hurting you?
  3. Can you think of one or more situations that you’ve allowed to march right through the open doors - and you’ve become embroiled in them - to the detriment of your staying positive focus?
  4. Are there visual or word images that are less than edifying to your very being - and they come through some open door on a regular basis?

My guess is that we can all think of some answers this question, based on the examples provided or others that we can come up with. In coaching language, these could be called “Tolerations.” It would be actions, people, items, tasks, responsibilities, and the like that you ‘tolerate’ but that don’t support you in the life you want - and in fact, are detracting from the life you want.

You need to get some clarity on what has slithered, slipped, slid, moved, marched, or marauded through doors that were left open - and that are no longer welcome. Maybe they were never welcome, but now you are going to consciously keep them out.

3. Third prompt: “How do you want your life to be different by this time next year?” You are the only person who knows the answer to that question. And if it’s going to change, you will have to reach some clarity on what needs to change. So, what do you want to be different?

  1. Who you have lunch with?
  2. What you eat for lunch?
  3. Where you go to lunch?
  4. When you eat lunch?

I’m playing a little bit, but not really. What do you want to be different? It can be HUGE things (like I want to be married instead of single - or single instead of married) or it can be medium-sized things (like I want to go to Costa Rica instead of Fernley for vacation) or it can be small things (like I want to part my hair on the left instead of on the right). WHATEVER - figure it out. What would you like to be different in the future (starting…maybe today) than it has been in the past?

Responding to these three question prompts will open some thinking and some direction for you. Now it is time for you to move toward that direction.

You are certainly welcome to access a variety of tools for staying positive by going to www.StayingPositiveinaFreakedoutWorld.com.  This is a great place if you are well aware that you - or those around you - are freaked-out to one degree or another and you can see that it is taking a toll.  You are invited to join the Staying Positive Society where you can access tools to use both personally and professionally.


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