Often, you need to make changes in your upcoming appointments and commitments. Many people aren’t sure how to let others know that an appointment needs to be changed or a deadline won’t be met. The best phrase I’ve ever found is “It turns out….” Use the phrase, “It turns out…” when you need to tell someone that you

• Can’t meet with him;

• Need to reschedule lunch with an acquaintance (and that you’ll get back to her…or not);

• Will have to change your “yes” to a “no” regarding an upcoming holiday party;

• Can still write the letter of support for a grant, but will need the person to send a draft of that letter to you, which you’ll then tweak as needed, put on your letter head and send back;

• Won’t be able to fill in for someone on the carpool for the 10^th time this month;

• Will need to contribute some money to an event rather than being there in person;

• What else?

When you say, “It turns out…” with no further explanation for why you are making the change, you are not being unfriendly, unresponsive, uncaring, irresponsible, or any of the adjectives that your “gremlin” might be saying to you.

You are clearing out space to work on your priorities. All professionals have far more requests for their our time than there is time to commit. You have to make choices. That is part of being a grown up. It’s a huge factor in your success in business and in life.

When you are trying to determine when to use the phrase “It turns out,” evaluate what is in your planner (calendar and to-do list) based on the criterion of importance. If something is not important, get rid of it.

Let me give you a little quick lesson on the difference between urgent and important (because many people get confused).

• important = adj 1: of much import, carrying with it serious consequences; weighty, momentous, grave, and significant. (Oxford English Dictionary)
• urgent = adj 1: pressing, compelling; calling for or demanding immediate action; anything characterized by urgency. (Oxford English Dictionary)

You have probably seen the Urgent/Important matrix, which was brought into popular culture by Stephen Covey, but was talked about by leadership and time management professionals prior to Covey’s book, 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. If you haven’t seen it, just Google it and you will see examples.

What I want you and everyone else reading this article to do is to remove appointments and tasks/to-do’s that are NOT important from your planner. Just use “It turns out,” as your power productivity phrase and start making space for your most important projects and commitments.

Good grief, Charlie Brown! Families are running around like crazy–and it’s chaotic, to say the least. Here’s my question: Is this the experience that you want your children, nieces, nephews, parents, and friends to remember about any time spent with you, i.e., that it’s chaotic and crazy? Hmmm….I think not. So, here are some ideas for putting in protected pockets of time and energy for your friends and family.

1. If your children or other members of your family are involved in an organized sport, limit it to one per person per season. This is easier on the child and on the rest of the family.  Running around like a nut is not building anyone’s relationships nor their overall health.  Choose one sport/person/season.

2. Have one day or evening a week that is “off limits” for anything scheduled, at all. Open calendars – heavenly.  These open spaces are protected pockets.  Everyone needs that – especially as a family.  Just be home and eat together, watch a movie, play board games, talk (really…just talk and find out what is happening in everyone’s lives), or whatever else would be pleasant and would help build the relationships and the feeling of ahhhh…space.

3. The “off limits” day refers to you, too. Regardless of whether you are a member of a ‘traditional’ family or friends group, you need a day/evening where you don’t have anything scheduled.  It’s your protected time.  You can rejuvenate and be better for everyone if you have this time and space.

4. Establish ASO time. Too many families are using all their time pockets for screen time (TV, video games, movie rentals, computer, etc.) and should consider instituting limits. Start with an “ASO” time (“All Screens Off”) by a certain hour or until a certain hour.

5. Define what pockets look and feel like for you, as far as your relationships and time with friends and family. First, get clear for yourself - and then let others in your personal circle know.  Next, find out what it looks and feels like for them. You might be surprised.

Putting in protected pockets for and with your family and friends help keep chaos at bay–and let you lead a life that is more peacefully productive. That’s what you want isn’t it?

As an adult, have you ever said, “Gosh, I have so much time and no real idea what to do with myself.” HA! It is, of course, the opposite.  Day after day, everyone is saying, “Yikes, I have way more to do that I can possibly do!”  Here are five ideas to help put ‘pockets’ (i.e., protected places and spaces) of time in your life.

1. Use a planner. When you write in a commitment of any type, add time before and after that commitment. It might be 10 minutes on either side or an hour on either side, just depending on the type of commitment.  The ‘padding’ you are putting in will be your ‘pockets’ and will help you stay sane.

2. Use just one planner. Put everything that you and your family do on that calendar that might have an impact on you. For example, if your spouse has an evening meeting, even though you don’t have to attend, you should place that on your calendar. It might affect you because you’ll be responsible for the children, you’ll be responsible for making dinner, you won’t be able to take your spouse to another event, etc.

3. Don’t fill up your calendar. Just because there is a space open on your calendar does not mean you have to fill it.  These spaces are your pockets.

4. Prepare stickers/labels to put on your calendar that designate “pocket” time. Once the sticker is on that spot, call it an appointment and don’t schedule on top of that time.

5. Schedule “clearing” or “recover” days. I schedule these days after I have been out of town and need a day to clear the decks or to recover from the travel. It’s not a day off, by any means. It’s a day to clear out the mail and email, to get my wash done, to return phone calls that couldn’t be returned while on the road, to get all my “stuff” put away. A clearing/recover day is a day to clear the decks or to recover so you are ready to hit the ground on the following day.

Consciously putting in pockets of time is a good first step toward putting pockets throughout your life. I love to write about this topic because it helps me focus on it as well. Check out the resources below to help yourself stay on track with putting in pockets and being more productive.

Do you have items that are on their last legs? That is, have you duct-taped (either literally or figuratively) something that you depend on? What would happen if it stopped working? For example, has your computer done things lately that let you know that the hard drive is just about to die? But you keep hoping it will just hang on a while longer? The last time you used your big flashlight, did you have to bang it against your hand so it would flicker back to life? And how will it be the next time your electricity goes out for a couple of hours and your flashlight doesn’t work at all?

If you don’t have any “pockets” in place with your possessions, then you are courting disaster.  Here are some thoughts on staying away from the disasters:

1. Proactively, you’ll only want to buy the very best you can afford. This is true in every category from kitchen faucets to hair dye to cars. Spend 10% more than you think you can so you’ll save (big time) in the long run.

2. Help the organization where you work understand this as well. Government agencies, in particular, are famous for being expected to “take the low bid.” Sometimes the low bid is the best one, and other times, the agency is ‘stepping over a dollar to save a dime” as the saying goes. You end up spending so much more in the long run if you buy ‘on the cheap.’

3. If, and only if, you are an EXPERT in repair of your particular item, should you attempt to repair anything yourself. When you factor in your time (and the wear-and-tear on your personal relationships) when you attempt to make an amateur repair, the real cost(s) becomes apparent.

4. Keep an up-to-date list of “Experts” in your address book. Put them all under “E.” You’ll forget their names from time to time–especially if the pocket has run out on a particular possession and you need to get something repaired immediately.  You want to be able to find the person who can help you when this happens.

5. If you elect to buy service contracts, write in your planner when you’ll call for your free check-up appointments. It is ever-so-much better to have something checked when it doesn’t need it – so you never have to call when it  has broken down.  And when you have a ‘free’ check up available, for heaven’s sake, use it.

All of these ideas need to be adjusted to fit your circumstances. Proactively put in the pockets you need with your possessions.

How is it that a grown woman/man can procrastinate day after day, month after month, and year after year? Because procrastination works. It keeps you from having to do the task that you just hate to do. Well here’s the news, folks, you can break the habit (if you want to, that is).

1. Keep a procrastination log. (You’ll enjoy this because you’ll be procrastinating from doing something else.) The way a procrastination log works is this: take notes on those items that you know you should be doing, but you just aren’t getting them done. As each item floats into your consciousness, write it down. You can have a special pad or notebook just for this.
2. After a few days of this, look at the items in your log and divide the list into “work” items and “personal” items. Sometimes, you will see a pattern just by doing this step! It’s amazing when you realize that you never procrastinate at work or you never procrastinate on personal items. If this is the case, then you could have some insight into the issue just by knowing this. If not, however, move on to the next step.
3. Look through your lists and see if there are any items that can be done in five minutes or less. Do these immediately! (Now you can check off a few items in your log and this is so very satisfying).
4. Next, look through your lists and tell the truth. Be honest with yourself. Are there items that you’ve written down that you know you’ll never do? Cross them off. They are just bugging you and weighing you down with guilt–and there’s no need for that if you know perfectly well that you will NEVER do them. Just cross them off.
5. “Return” a task that really isn’t yours. This might be a home task or a work task. You probably have a gracious plenty of tasks, responsibilities, and projects that are yours and yours alone. The last thing you need to do is take on any extras. So give the task back to the original owner.
6. Delegate anything on your list that you can reasonably delegate. Can you pay another person (or company) to do one or more of the tasks on your list? It’s possible there are children or teens in your house who would clean up your linen closet/pantry/storage area for $$. Isn’t it worth that to you? And heavens knows that whatever your salary is, you are probably procrastinating items at work that could be hired out to someone who makes less than you do.
7. Is there anything on your procrastination log that really calls for a professional to step in and help you or take over the task? What if the carpet in your home or office is pulling up from the seam and you can’t fix it yourself (nor should you try to!)? Set a specific time every week to make phone calls to professionals to help you with odd tasks like this.
8. Check through your list to see if there are actually procrastinated tasks that you are afraid of. How about that big project your employer asked you to do? Even if you aren’t going to do the task today, make an outline of what must be done to complete the task. Force yourself to complete one item on the outline before you leave work today. Ed Bliss calls this the salami technique. Just slice off a tiny little piece and get it done. Much easier (and tastier) than trying to gnaw on a whole salami.
9. Hmmmm…now what about those tasks on your procrastination log that you hate to do? Accounting, filing, etc.–and it depends on the person what is on this list. If you really can’t stand to do the task, but it’s part of your job, then get to work 10 minutes early for the next several days until these items are caught up. Then designate an early morning time to complete the item on a regular basis.
10. Lastly, don’t allow yourself to whine about your procrastination. In the time it takes you to whine, you could have finished the task.

And a final tip to get rid of the procrastination time thieves is to read Rita Emmett’s book The Procrastinators’ Handbook. It’s worth the time it takes to read the book, believe me. No thievery there!

Quote to Consider (and an action to take):

“You’ve got a lot of choices. If getting out of bed in the morning is a chore and you’re not smiling on a regular basis, try another choice.” ~Steven D. Woodhull

For the next 7 days, just observe how you feel when you get up in the morning.

If it’s a chore on the days you are “going to work” but not on the other days, then that’s something to notice.

If it’s NOT a chore on the days you’re going to work, but it is on the others, then that’s something to notice, too.

See if your face is comfortable going into a smile…and reflect on the last time someone said to you, “You are always smiling.” If you can’t remember the last time someone said that, then see if you can determine why.

See if you notice any patterns as you consciously observe your emotions and behaviors. Do you see any patterns, and in particular, do you notice a pattern that is more in your professional life or your personal life?

Once you have done your self-observations and considered the ideas in this article, then you may be able to identify ‘so what do I do?’ for yourself.  Or you may be looking for other resources to move away from ‘underwhelm’ to being ‘just whelmed.’

One of the free resources for moving toward being ‘just whelmed’ on a consistent basis is being part of the group (worldwide) who receive Meggin’s weekly emails (free!) at:

**I Want to Be Just Whelmed (http://www.JustWhelmed.com)

If you would prefer quick, short weekly tips, then the following site is another place to find suggestions and other tools to support you in your quest for peaceful productivity:

**Top Ten Productivity Tips (http://www.TopTenProductivityTips.com)

If you think you are only in “overwhelm” but not “underwhelm,” please don’t ignore this article.  Believe it or not, you may be in “underwhelm” part of the time or you certainly may know some others who are in “underwhelm” and they could use this information.

In thinking through the reasons why someone becomes (and stays) ‘underwhelmed’, I’ve identified the following three:

• Work (or a life) that doesn’t engage your talents, education, or passions.  Day in and day out, do you feel like you’re an “untapped resource?”  Well, that takes its toll.  

• Work (or a life) that involves people who are uncommitted, uninspired, and unworthy of your attention and talents.  Tell the truth…is the majority of your time spent working with and around people who ‘could care less,’ ‘have retired but still come to work,’ ‘are negative Nellies (or Neds),’ and just generally drain the energy and life right out of you?  

• Work (or a life) where you rarely get a chance to work on anything of importance.  Are you questioning–on a regular basis–why you’re even doing what you do?  Does it seem as if it doesn’t really matter to anyone, particularly in the ‘big scheme of things’? Do you wonder if you’re making a contribution?

If you are currently feeling underwhelmed, see if the feelings can be identified and put into one or more of the 3 categories listed above.  Think about it…right now, which of these is most problematic for you (if any of these are)?  And remember, it may be problematic for you if there are people around you who are underwhelmed.

In our next blog post we will talk about things you need to consider and observations you need to make.

And remember…

“It is our choices that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.” ~Joanne Kathleen Rowling

1. Overwhelmed
2. Underwhelmed, and
3. Just Whelmed

Be very clear on the fact that you are the only person who can distinguish between and among these three for yourself. Each person has a different tolerance overall…and that tolerance also varies depending on what else is going on in a person’s life. Take a look at the definitions below.  As you read through each of these sets of definitions, think about what other words you would add to what is already there? Make each definition your own by adding phrases, words, ideas that apply to you and your situation.

Overwhelmed:

overcome, engulfed, flooded, inundated, overpowered, swamped, frantic, frenetic, shut-down, out of control, crazed, anxious, and…

Underwhelmed:

frustrated, disappointed, discomfited, lethargic, unfocused, bored, and…

Just Whelmed:

productive, energized, jazzed, “in the zone,” challenged, and…

Create a little chart for yourself.  Just make 3 columns or 3 boxes (or whatever format works best for you). Label the 3 sections with “overwhelmed,” “underwhelmed,” and “just whelmed.”  You can then use this chart for the whole week or you can make one for each day; it’s up to you.

Observe yourself moving from one state of being to another and notate it on your chart when it happens. What you’re looking for are patterns in these shifts. For example, do shifts happen:

• at certain times of the day?
• around some people?
• with particular tasks?
• when you’re too hungry? or
• a myriad of other possibilities…

Keep an eye on what is happening and see if you can tell why it might be happening. You’re smart (that’s always the assumption I make). Smart people notice patterns if they’re paying attention. I’m just asking you to pay attention this week. 

Henry Ward Beecher said,

We sleep, but the loom of life never stops, and the pattern
which was weaving when the sun went down is weaving
when it comes up in the morning.

There are patterns in your life related to so many things…but this week, just notice the patterns that are there as you move between and among overwhelm, underwhelm, and “just whelmed.”  And if you would like to continue learning about these three different levels of ‘whelm,’  then the following sites are places to find suggestions and other tools to support you in your quest for peaceful productivity:

** I Just Want to be Whelmed (http://www.justwhelmed.com)

**Top Ten Productivity Tips (http://www.TopTenProductivityTips.com)

(c) 2009 by Meggin McIntosh, Ph.D., “The Ph.D. of Productivity”(tm). Through her company, Emphasis on Excellence, Inc., Meggin McIntosh changes what people know, feel, dream, and do. Sound interesting? It is!

Imagine reframing your perception of what time is. What if you saw time as…

• Fluid
• Plentiful
• Available
• Abundant
• A blank canvas
• Expansive
• Ready
• Free
• Your friend (rather than your enemy)…

Imagine the difference in how you’d feel if one or more of the ones listed above was descriptive of how you view time. Just say these out loud and see what happens. And remember…you have all the time there is. ”Time is a created thing. To say ‘I don’t have time’ is to say ‘I don’t want to.’” ~ Lao Tzu

You Have All the Time There Is…Really

You have all the time that there is. You can rail against whatever you want to, but you have all there is. Can you look at time as fluid rather than fixed? I will grant you that we all have a set amount of time each day and each week. You have (and I and everyone else has) 168 hours a week…no more and no less. However, if you can make the shift that time is fluid rather than fixed (and it’s a shift that I’ve been working on to the point that I’m moving closer and closer to that mindset) you will surprise yourself at the increase in what you see as possible.

Once you become more familiar with the sense that there is an ample amount of time and adopt the thinking of, ‘Gosh, I have plenty of time today to do these things,’ then you will find yourself doing whatever it is you need to do in a much more relaxed and creative way than when you’re thinking, ‘Oh, it’s already 2:00, it’s already 3:00. Oh, no!’

The day is the exact same length of time and you have the exact same amount of stuff to do, yet it’s completely different in the way that it feels and it’s also completely different in your outcome. I promise. See what you find out in your own experience. It’s a shift.

And if your view of time is just one area that overwhelms you – and you would like to be ‘just whelmed,’ then you’re invited to join others (worldwide) who receive Meggin’s weekly emails (free!) at

**I Want to Be Just Whelmed (http://www.JustWhelmed.com)

If you would prefer quick, short weekly tips, then the following site is another place to find suggestions and other tools to support you in your quest for peaceful productivity:

**Top Ten Productivity Tips (http://www.TopTenProductivityTips.com)

(c) 2009 by Meggin McIntosh, Ph.D., “The Ph.D. of Productivity”(tm). Through her company, Emphasis on Excellence, Inc., Meggin McIntosh changes what people know, feel, dream, and do. Sound interesting? It is!

Read the following steps…and do them, please.

1. Identify the three areas where you are the most overwhelmed right now. The areas might be big or small, personal or professional, longstanding or brand new. Write down those three right now.
2. Next to each of the three areas, write down just one way that the overwhelm could be lessened.
3. Now, right next to what you just wrote down, note the name of a specific person, business, service, or agency, who could be a source of help.
4. Contact one of these source of help…and ask for the help you need. Please. Just ask.
5. Be brave. You might even trying asking someone for help that you have the feeling that the answer will be “no.” If that’s what the person says, well, you were already thinking that was a possibility. And if the person says, “yes,” then what a wonderful surprise! And it kind of encourages you to ask someone else for help.
6. Either way, please identify the help you need, what would help, who would be a ‘helper,’ and then ask.
7. Start small, but start.

Now, if you are reading this and you are great at asking and trusting others, then I’d encourage you to acknowledge one or more of those people for the help you have received and that they have given. An acknowledgment is much more than a compliment. It affects the person who receives the acknowledgment because it very deliberately touches on what is important and why it matters. For example, a compliment you might give to someone who helped you would be:

“Hey, thanks so much for helping me get this workshop room set up. I appreciate it.”

An acknowledgment for help would be:

“Lisa. You have no idea how much your dependability and attention to detail make this event possible. I could not possibly do this on my own. You think about the participants, you think about the budget, you get to know all the employees at the hotel, and you do all this smoothly and naturally. I notice the way you have everything set ‘just so,’ and I know that everyone who walks in the room knows that he or she is being taken care of. I especially know that and I appreciate it more than you know.”

See the difference (and it’s not just the number of words). And I really do acknowledge and appreciate all the help that my chief productivity assistant, Dr. Lisa Cady, gives to me.

And if you know you are overwhelmed – and part of it is because you never ask for (or expect) help, and you would like to learn more so you can be ‘just whelmed,’ then you’re invited to join others (worldwide) who receive Meggin’s weekly emails (free!) at

**I Want to Be Just Whelmed (http://www.JustWhelmed.com)

If you would prefer quick, short weekly tips, then the following site is another place to find suggestions and other tools to support you in your quest for peaceful productivity:

**Top Ten Productivity Tips (http://www.TopTenProductivityTips.com)

(c) 2009 by Meggin McIntosh, Ph.D., “The Ph.D. of Productivity”(tm). Through her company, Emphasis on Excellence, Inc., Meggin McIntosh changes what people know, feel, dream, and do. Sound interesting? It is!