Do you sometimes wish that things were different for you? Have you often thought of, “If only…”? What if you combined those two ideas – and turned them into actions you could take?

Let us start with you making your own list of things that you would like to be different. It might be relationships you have, certain work that you do, something about your physical being, or other practices in which you engage. So make your list and then read the rest of the article.

Now, looking at your list, you need to begin to think about “If this, then, this.” That is, you will consider, “If this (relationship, work, practice, or habit) is going to occur, then this (action, conversation, etc.) will need to happen. You can set up a page that has lots of sentence frames like this:

If ________________________, then _______________________.

Now, begin to fill them in. Let me give you a few samples first:

• An example would be, if I am not going to work with high maintenance clients, then I need to talk with my colleagues to find out if they want these clients or if we need to verify the ease of working with the person before our firm ever takes them on.

• Another example would be, if we are going to donate money to a special cause instead of buying gifts at the holiday season, then I need to have a way of letting people know that this is our choice and we encourage them to do the same.

• Here’s another: If I am keeping the door closed on cynical, negative language, then I need to remind the people in my house that I don’t want to hear such language and will just take myself out of the room if that is the level of discourse they are engaged in. (I know… I make it sound easy, don’t I?! HA!)

Write out if ______________ (I intend to keep the door closed on x) then ______________ here is what I will need to do.

It is not some magical occurrence to make changes in your life, that is, closing or keeping closed certain “doors” in your life so that your life can be better next year than it has been. You need to be deliberate about keeping doors closed that you just don’t want to pop or creak open this next year.

So with your if, then statements, I imagine you found yourself with some work to do.

1. Maybe there are conversations you need to have.

2. Maybe there are phone calls you need to make.

3. Maybe you need to schedule time weekly to take care of something.

Keep in mind, If this, then that. Be purposeful and deliberate about your decisions to stay on the upside vs. on the downside. If you are going to stay in an empowered, positive frame of mind, it involves taking actions based on the decisions you make.

You can do this.

The sculptor produces the beautiful statue by chipping away such parts of the marble block as are not needed – it is a process of elimination. (Elbert)

So what do you need to ‘chip away’ that is currently introducing or exacerbating the complexity in your life (and thus, the overwhelm)?  You might consider one or more of the following categories as you think about places where you can make the choices to introduce easier (rather than harder) into your life. 

1. Technology
2. Personal maintenance (hair, makeup, nails, clothing)
3. “Stuff”/possessions
4. Meals/food
5. Yard/garden

Let’s just look at this last category.  Depending on where you live, if you have a yard and/or garden, you can turn the maintenance of it into a full-time job, an overwhelming responsibility, a burdensome task, a dreaded weekly chore – OR, you can simplify it by any of following means:

• Hire someone else to do all the maintenance – year-round.
• Delegate out the portions of it that are most overwhelming to you.
• Xeriscape it so that there are only small pieces that you will have to maintain.
• Find out which plants (trees, shrubs, flowers, grass, etc.) are low-maintenance. 
• Decide that yards are meant to be enjoyed not fretted over.  It’s a mindshift for some people – but it can be a way to release much of the stress.

So, this week, observe yourself – and those around you – and notice the times where something has become more difficult than it needs to be.  Begin to minimize the complexity by the choices you make. 

And if the complexity of your everyday life is just one area that overwhelms you – and you would like to be ‘just whelmed,’ then you’re invited to join others (worldwide) who receive Meggin’s weekly emails (free!) at **I Want to Be Just Whelmed (http://www.JustWhelmed.com)

If you would prefer quick, short weekly tips, then the following site is another place to find suggestions and other tools to support you in your quest for peaceful productivity: **Top Ten Productivity Tips (http://www.TopTenProductivityTips.com)

(c) 2009 by Meggin McIntosh, Ph.D., “The Ph.D. of Productivity”(tm). Through her company, Emphasis on Excellence, Inc., Meggin McIntosh changes what people know, feel, dream, and do. Sound interesting? It is!

1. Some failures are huge disappointments.  Generally, if your marriage “fails,” you feel some disappointment. You went into the relationship with some sense of expectation; when it doesn’t work out the way you were hoping and planning, then it’s incredibly disappointing.  Not earning tenure at your university MAY be a huge disappointment or it may be the best thing that every happened to you because you find another position at a different university – and you thrive there.   

Be sure to continue with tomorrow’s post and learn more about ways to view failure – and between now and then, you may want to access one of these tools (free): 

**Top Ten Productivity Tips (http://www.TopTenProductivityTips.com)

**Articles for Professors (http://www.ArticlesforProfessors.com)

(c) 2009 by Meggin McIntosh, Ph.D., “The Ph.D. of Productivity”(tm). Through her company, Emphasis on Excellence, Inc., Meggin McIntosh changes what people know, feel, dream, and do. Sound interesting? It is!

1. What do you want?
2. What are you willing to do or go through to get there?
3. What will you have to give up?
4. What will you gain?
5. Is your life the way you imagined it or the way you wanted it?
6. How far off is it?

I titled this post, “Essential Questions – If You Can Answer These, You Have a Choice.”  So what’s the choice? 

Well, now you can do something about your life…or not.  Depends on your answers, doesn’t it?