Dealing with Energy Thieves (1 or 2 people), AKA “pie suckers” – Part 2

Posted on June 6th, 2010, by Meggin McIntosh, Ph.D.

This is the second part of a previous post about “pie suckers” so, to review:

Roger Mellott speaks about stress management for professionals. He discusses the idea of having an “energy pie” and posits that some people wake up with an energy pie the size of a dinner mint and others wake up with an energy pie that is the size of a child’s swimming pool.

The lessons we can take from this are:

We need to have the biggest energy pie possible;
We need to be aware of where our energy pie goes;
We need to avoid what I call “pie suckers.” You know what I mean….those people who just suck the life right out of you. There’s a sucking sound that you hear whenever they approach.

So, today’s post addresses how to deal with ‘pie suckers,” i.e., those people who are thieves of your energy.

Under no circumstances should you share a meal with your pie sucker. Even if it means sitting alone in your office at lunch, don’t chance it. (And a private lunch with you and your thoughts sounds pretty good, doesn’t it?)
Do not feel obligated to give your pie sucker birthday or holiday cards or gifts. If your pie sucker gives these items to you, thank him/her. Refer to item #5.
If you share office space with your pie sucker, rearrange the furniture so you don’t have to face him/her. Put up a partition if possible.
Remember that pie suckers are stealing from you. This isn’t nice.
High blood pressure is expensive. Is your pie sucker worth the price?

Please note: The moniker “pie sucker” applies *only* to one or two people in your life (at least I hope so). This isn’t the person who just sort of irritates you now and then or someone you just don’t care for. This is for the person that just drains your energy in ways that distinguish them from others. It’s sad to say, but usually when I talk about this in workshops, people know exactly what I’m talking about. If you have more than one or two pie-suckers, you may need to do some seriously re-thinking about your work or personal life and how this is happening.

Additional note: In all honesty, we are likely to be someone’s pie sucker, too. We should take a look at what people might find about us that just drains the life out of them. There’s room for growth in all of us.